Adolescence is a time of immense change and growth physically, emotionally and socially.
For teenagers, their family environment plays a crucial role in shaping their mental health, self-esteem and resilience.
We live in a country where family structures are diverse and often influenced by cultural, economic and social factors, understanding the impact of family dynamics on teen mental health is essential.
Cayley Jorgensen, a registered counsellor and founder of Ingage Support, spoke to “Independent Media Lifestyle“ about how pivotal family dynamics are to a teen’s development.
“Family dynamics are often the foundation of a teen’s sense of identity, safety, and emotional regulation,” she explained.
Supportive relationships within the family can foster a strong sense of security and confidence, while strained dynamics can lead to feelings of anxiety, isolation and low self-worth.
Healthy v toxic family dynamics
In healthy families, there’s open communication, mutual respect and a balance between boundaries and freedom. People feel safe expressing their thoughts and emotions without fear of judgment.
“Healthy dynamics allow teens to explore their independence while knowing they have a safety net,” Jorgensen shared.
Families with healthy dynamics respect boundaries, handle disagreements constructively, and create an environment where all members feel seen and valued.
On the other hand, toxic family dynamics can include constant criticism, control, emotional manipulation, and unresolved conflicts.
“Toxicity doesn’t always manifest as open hostility; sometimes, it’s the absence of healthy interactions. For example, families that avoid difficult conversations may inadvertently create a sense of isolation, leaving teens feeling unheard and unsupported.”
Jorgensen warned: “Teens in toxic environments can experience low self-esteem, difficulty trusting others, and even physical symptoms such as headaches or trouble sleeping.”
The influence of technology on family dynamics
Teens may prioritise their digital relationships over in-person interactions, creating distance within the family.
At the same time, technology can spark conflicts as parents struggle to set boundaries around screen time or monitor their teen's online behaviour.
However, Jorgensen has observed a positive shift.
“Families are becoming more open to discussing mental health and seeking professional help, which is a step in the right direction.”
How strained family relationships impact teens
When family relationships are strained, the effects on a teen’s mental health can be profound.
Teens often internalise family conflicts, which may manifest as anxiety, depression, anger or rebellion.
They might withdraw from family interactions or seek validation in unhealthy ways, such as through risky behaviour or toxic relationships.
For example, we live in societies where many families face economic pressures, teens may take on adult responsibilities and parents often experience frequent stress.
This can lead to feelings of inadequacy or helplessness. In other cases, strained sibling relationships whether due to competition, bullying or neglect, can create long-lasting emotional wounds.
Jorgensen explained that unresolved family tensions can leave teens carrying unresolved trauma into adulthood.
“Teens from unhealthy environments might struggle with trust, intimacy, and self-worth later in life, she said. However, with the right support and awareness, even teens from difficult backgrounds can break those cycles and thrive.”
Rebuilding trust and improving family dynamics
If family dynamics are strained, it’s important to take steps toward rebuilding trust and improving relationships.
Open and honest communication is the first step. Both teens and parents need to acknowledge their roles in conflicts, apologise, and commit to making changes.
Trust isn’t rebuilt overnight.
Small, positive interactions over time can help repair the relationship and strengthen the bond.” This could include setting aside time for regular family activities, creating opportunities for open dialogue, or even seeking family counselling.
It's not your responsibility to "fix" the toxic person: You can only control your own actions and reactions.
Be assertive, not aggressive: Communicate your needs firmly but respectfully.
Don't engage in blame games: Focus on finding solutions rather than assigning blame.
Be patient: Changing family dynamics takes time and consistent effort.
Nevertheless, the common thread remains: teens thrive when they feel supported, valued, and understood by their families.
Initiatives like Ingage Support, which Jorgensen founded, aim to bridge the gap by providing accessible, technology-driven mental health resources for teens and their families.
Signs to watch for
Parents and caregivers can look out for signs that a teen may be struggling with their mental health due to family dynamics.
These include:
- Withdrawal from family activities or conversations.
- Increased irritability, anger or rebellious behaviour.
- Changes in sleep or eating patterns.
- A decline in academic performance or interest in hobbies.
- Seeking validation through risky behaviour or toxic relationships.
If any of these signs persist, it’s important to seek help. South Africa has a growing number of mental health resources, from school counsellors to online platforms.