There's a time-worn and rather cynical saying that “If lots is good, more is better, and too much is just about right”.
We can't help wondering whether that particular bit of pop philosophy originated at Affalterbach Motorenbau und EntwicklungsGesellschaft, as AMG unleashes a whole salvo of revised big-bore Mercedes variants on the South African market, each powered by one of its two most powerful V8s.
We'll start, because it's physically the smallest, with the C 63 AMG Coupé, which rounds off the C-Class AMG family alongside the C 63 AMG sedan and station wagon models.
Each is motivated by the AMG equivalent of a sledgehammer, the proven 6208cc, naturally aspirated V8.
In standard trim it's tuned for 336kW at 6800 revs and a rumbling 600Nm at 5000rpm - or, if you opt for the Performance Package, which includes forged pistons, con rods and lightweight crankshaft borrowed from the AMG SLS, saving 3kg in internal weight and increasing power to 358kW at the same revs.
That'll knock a tenth off the coupé's 0-100 spring time (from 4.4 to 4.3 seconds) while top speed is, as always, limited to 250km/h.
AMG also quotes fuel consumption of 12 litres per 100km and CO2 emissions at 280g/km; we'll take those figures under advisement.
All of which reaches the rear wheels via a seven-speed AMG Speedshift MCT-7 auto transmission. Although this is a conventional slush-box rather than a dual-clutch transmission, it borrows from the newer technololgy in that it has a wet, multiplate clutch rather than a power-sapping torque convertor, for quicker changes and crisper response.
In the words of our our launch correspondent, Jesse Adams: “All the good things about Merc's C 63, that's been out for three years, are carried over into the new Coupé version. That glorious 6.2-litre V8 still shouts like a baritone banshee from the twin tailpipes, and it still shoves you hard into its bucket seats when you nail throttle, just as it always did.
“It accelerates relentlessly if you've got the balls to floor the gas, and the gearbox, which isn't of modern dual clutch-type but still incredibly quick, wallops up through the gears with a pounding sensation that you can really feel in the seat of your pants.
“Unfortunately, AMG's old 'limp-mode syndrome' carries over too and, as Mercedes embarrassingly demonstrated at the Zwartkop circuit in African heat, the C63's electronics call it quits before two consecutive flat-out laps can be completed. If you're after a competent track tool you'll have to look elsewhere, because this Merc doesn't like being hammered on for extended periods.”
The C-Class sports flagwaver also has a specially designed three-link front suspension set-up, reinforced multilink rear suspension and wider track all round.
“Handling is pretty good for a car of this nature,” says Adams, “but the BMW M3's still much sharper and more direct. That said, the C 63 is the more comfortable of the two and if I were to choose one to drive home right now I'd take the Merc.
“Typically, as would happen with any car capable of barrelling into a corner with this much speed, it will understeer unless you ease it in with gentle turn-in. But, either way, once you're back on the gas the back will come around to get it all in line again.”
The most striking new interior feature is a special AMG multifunction sports steering wheel, leather-trimmed and flattened at both top and bottom.
Adams' hands-on verdict: “From behind the wheel it's pretty much three-year-old C 63 status quo, but I did notice the fancy new colour display that Mercedes has fitted into the centre of the Speedo that reads out trip information operated the newly styled steering wheel's controls.
“The new style bonnet bulges are also very evident from the driver's seat, or at least more so than in previous models.”
E 63 SEDAN: ENOUGH IS ENOUGH
Despite its numbering, the 2012 E 63 AMG actually has the all-new AMG 5.5-litre biturbo V8 that we recently experienced in the new CLS 63 AMG, with 386kW on tap at 5250-5750rpm and 700Nm from 1750-4000rpm, at a claimed average fuel consumption of only 9.8 litres per 100km.
But this is an AMG, so there's also the Performance Package for the testicularly well-endowed, which bumps maximum boost from one bar to 1.3 and raises peak power to 410kW from 5250-5750rpm and torque to a ground-shaking 800Nm from 2000-4500rpm, knocking the 0-100 sprint time down from 4.3 to 4.2 seconds.
The 5461cc V8 - designated internally as the M 157 - has spray-guided direct fuel-injection with piezo injectors, an aluminium crankcase, four-valve technology with variable cam timing, air/water intercooling, alternator management and a stop/start function.
It uses the same MCT-7 lock-up auto transmission as the C 63 and a new electromechanical power-steering system. The Ride Control sports suspension has a specially designed front axle with independent wheel carriers to increase negative camber, 56mm wider track than the standard E 500, steel suspension struts at the front and air suspension struts at rear with automatic levelling.
An electronic damping system automatically adjusts the damping characteristics depending on the driving situation and reduces body lean; the whole plot runs on special 18” AMG alloys with 255/40 front and 285 35 rear rubber.
Adams' take: “Having recently tested AMG's brutal new CLS 63 which also has the new 386kW/700Nm biturbo 5.5-litre V8, I knew what to expect from the new E 63 with the same engine.
“It'll break traction if you so much as look at the throttle pedal too hard, and even at around 100km/h the traction control light will flicker if you get overenthusiastic with your right foot.
“Acceleration here is best described as insane, and it's one of the few cars I've driven where I actually feel that enough is enough with power outputs. But then, for an extra R82 000 they'll pump it up to 420kW and 800Nm. Good lord.”
PRICES
C 63 AMG Sedan - R862 300
C 63 AMG Estate - R871 700
C 63 AMG Coupé - R923 700
C 63 Performance Package - R78 100
E 63 AMG Sedan - R1 257 000
E 63 Performance Package - R82 000
Every Mercedes-Benz car comes with a two-year, unlimited distance warranty and a six-year or 120 000km maintenance plan.