Father’s Day or single Mothers’ Day?

Photographer Motshwari Mofokeng with his daughters Motheo 9 months old and Sebabatso, 3. A loving father of two beautiful girls makes time for them, between his action-packed life as a press photographer. Picture: Shelley Kjonstad/African News Agency (ANA)

Photographer Motshwari Mofokeng with his daughters Motheo 9 months old and Sebabatso, 3. A loving father of two beautiful girls makes time for them, between his action-packed life as a press photographer. Picture: Shelley Kjonstad/African News Agency (ANA)

Published Jun 19, 2023

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Johannesburg - It has become the norm for Father’s Day to turn into a continuous conflict of opinions, whether the subject is about deadbeat fathers or women claiming it is a refashioned Mother’s Day.

It is no surprise to see “Happy Father’s Day to My Mom” as a way to highlight fathers’ absence.

This has been denounced with claims that it all changes the significance of the day, which is to celebrate and show love to fathers who play a meaningful role in their children’s lives.

Father’s Day is not only dedicated to fathers, but also to relevant father figures and the influence of fathers in society.

In the past few years, we have seen many fathers step up to meet their family and childcare duties.

To emphasise the importance of fathers, last year the SABC introduced a film, Heartlines: Fathers Matter, which explored why fathers matter in society.

This was done in the hope of seeing 5 million men and society at large get involved in the biggest campaign of its kind in Africa.

The film was also intended to encourage fathers and men to be part of a movement to be positively involved in the lives of children.

CEO and founder of Heartlines, Garth Japhet, spoke about the essence of the film, highlighting that fatherhood can only be done as a collective.

“Changing perceptions and behaviours around fatherhood can only be done as a collective effort involving thousands, if not millions, of South Africans. So much so, that Heartlines hopes to see 5 million men and several million women, young adults and children get involved in the biggest campaign of its kind in Africa by watching the films and engaging in conversations on the topics broached in the films,” said Japhet.

And while many women continue to publicly honour men who are present in their children’s lives, “deadbeat dads” has also been trending at number one on social media.

Distinct views have been shared about deadbeats, with many opening up about the consequences of absent fathers in a child’s life.

“Children who lack a father figure are more likely to drop out of school. Education is key to breaking the cycle of poverty,” said @ ItsKiprotich1.

“We know that children who grow up with absent fathers can suffer lasting damage. They are more likely to end up in poverty, drop out of school, become addicted to drugs, or have a child out of wedlock,” tweeted @moruribrian.

“Is it just me, or can we all agree that kids without a father figure are at an increased risk of engaging in criminal activities or antisocial behaviour ... ” said @NziokiCaroline.

@_MeladiM suggested that the day be split into two, where present fathers will also be celebrated.

“Can we split the day into when we appreciate the awesome dads and when we start dragging deadbeats? Just so there’s order, nyana.”

Sharing his sentiments, @Kaysparks said women should stop trapping men. “There’s nothing like deadbeat dads; close your legs ’n stop trapping men with unwanted pregnancies with the aim of procuring marriage after you’ve wasted your prime years ...”

The Star

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